Traveling the world is not always sunshine and rainbows. Prague is an incredible city, but it isn't the city for me. It has a rich, yet ominous history. It's sadness is beautiful, and its weather is dreadful.
In the short month that I was there, Prague was cold and rainy 80% of the time. It was such a drastic change of environment from Split, Croatia. It was as if someone literally flipped a light switch. My month in the Czech Republic was a really dark time for me, and it came with feeling lost, exhausted, and uninspired.
"Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass. It's about learning to dance in the rain."
I was told that most people who have been on Remote Year hit a slump or a rough spot around month 3 or 4. Mine hit during month 2. I needed this slump. I needed it sooner rather than later. I started to lose myself in Prague. I was distracted by negativity, fear, and doubt. I let these thoughts entertain me for a whole month, and it's embarrassing to admit that.
"Never regret a day in your life. Good days give you happiness. Bad days give you experience. Worst days give you lessons, and best days give you memories."
This wasn't like me. I wanted my sense of creativity back. I wanted my never ending smile back that I constantly wore slapped across my face the previous month. I wanted to WANT to go "explauren" again.
But that's where the reality becomes so simple. While I was digging up this massive hole trying to find solutions to all of these "wants", I should have been focusing my energy on climbing up and out of the hole. In fact, I shouldn't have been digging at all. My answers were all around me. I am the answer. I am the one with the power and control. I can give myself what I want.
"A bird sitting on a tree is never afraid of the branch breaking, because her trust is not on the branch but on it's own wings."
I'm allowed to have a bad day, week, or month, but I can't allow it to last forever. I have to take the initiative to express to myself and others what I need. I cannot hide and take pity on myself while I wait for someone to save me. NO. I need to quit being my own enemy and start rescuing myself.
"Worrying does not take away tomorrow's trouble. It takes away today's peace."
Prague was a MAJOR reality check for me. I may have lost myself last month, but I am ready to bounce back. It's time to go back to my toolbox, and use the things I know and have access to in order to build myself back up. It will not be easy, but it is necessary.
"The secret to change is to focus all of your energy, not on fighting the old, but on building the new."
A small activity that seems to lift me up sometimes is to lookup, read, and maybe even write down some motivational quotes. It seems silly, but it helps. Throughout this post, you can see some of my favorites.
Hopefully some warmer, sunnier days in the colorful city of Lisbon will help bring back some life into me. As I continue this journey around the world, I will find and collect pieces of myself that will eventually complete a puzzle that begins to make sense.
In the meantime, I want you all to know that dark times exist in all of us, no matter where you are located in the world, what stage in life you in, or what journey you are currently on. So if you are reading this, I would love for you to comment or post you favorite uplifting quote for me and others to see.
Sending you all love from Lisbon, Portugal.